Solomon was preparing for his audition for Britain’s Got Talent, which was set to take place in Consett at the beginning of Autumn. There were posters all over the town with information that the competition was open to everyone.
Solomon had been entertaining all his friends for months now – perched on top of the dry stone wall – in the sunny garden where he lived. None of the other snails could sing; spending most of their days making slimy paths and patterns around the patio or dozing next to the flower pots after they had had their fill of leaves for lunch.
Not so for the singing snail who spent most of his mornings practising his vocal exercises while gargling with dew from his favourite plants. His range and his repertoire were amazing as he could perform anything from Elvis to Mario Lanza with a bit of BB King’s Blues thrown in for good measure.
The bees, who were usually far too busy to take any notice, stopped in their tracks when they heard of the singing snail’s plans, pausing to watch his playlist. In fact, the whole garden came to a standstill to cheer on Solomon’s practice audition as he had invited them all by text, as snail mail is far too slow. And he’d asked for feedback.
The butterflies waited patiently with closed wings, basking on swaying flower heads. An army of ants climbed up their hill to secure a better view, while the woodlice were happy to crawl their way out into the sunshine.
A visiting crane fly put the word out, and he and his mates dangled their long legs over the Wheelie bin for a better view. When all were gathered, the singing snail switched on his boom box and took up his microphone. ‘Blue Suede Shoes’ went down really well, followed by ‘Hound Dog’, while a tap dancing rendition of ‘Jailhouse Rock’ brought the house down. Solomon’s audience were in raptures and applauded the best way they could, as none of them had any hands to speak of.
Solomon – The Singing Snail, being his stage name – rested in his dressing room next to the blackberry bush, gargled with some more dew, then mentally made a list of songs he would sing in the second half.
Knowing the crowd were now warmed up, he thought he’d try some rock music, while quickly responding to his restless audience who were shouting ‘We want more’ in unison. Taking to the stage, Solomon sang his heart out to “Bohemian Rhapsody’ ‘Stairway to Heaven’ and ‘Livin’ On A Prayer’. His garden friends had nothing but praise for him and showed their appreciation by cheering loudly. Solomon was ecstatic and, packing up his boom box, made his way to the auditions. They didn’t take place until 7 pm, but he was a slow walker and needed to set off in good time.
His friends waved their goodbyes from the garden and wished him good luck. As he reached the gate, there was a loud screech as a magpie landed in front of him. Terrified, Solomon thought his end had come, yet was presently surprised when the magpie introduced herself as Tallulah the talent scout, and she had been so impressed with his vocals while perched on the fairy tree that she offered him a recording contract on the spot, and a residency at one of Consett’s top night spots.
Delighted, Solomon eased himself into the silver limousine and set off on his new adventure, not forgetting to text his garden friends to tell them he’d be back soon.
